Heidi discusses Sarah's chart and the journey of healing-- from instability and addiction-- to standing in one's fullness and offering one's gift. Sarah is a Sagittarius with a Virgo Moon and Capricorn Rising.
Hi Heidi :)
Thank you for your wonderful podcast. I JUST stumbled across a couple of days ago by looking up the word radiant.
My question is in relation to my two biggest life challenges - or opportunities for growth shall we say ;) I have had an eating disorder most of my life. I developed anorexia at the age of 14, and then became bulimic at around 16. Since then, I have been on a slow and steady road to deep spiritual healing, self-love, bodily awareness, and mental strengthening that has allowed me to become my most authentic healthy self and express myself in a way that is balanced and fulfilling.
My question is in relation to how long it has taken me to move through the lessons and understanding involved in my eating behaviours and thinking pattens. I have done this almost entirely on my own (as in, no professional help), largely due to a lack of financial resources at varying stages of my life. Interesting, as I am actually now a psychologist (as well as a singer-songwriter) :) Creating a work that I love AND having it be financially viable has been my second challenge - to create a confidence in my financial flow and the energetic giving and receiving.
Anyway.. I remember when I was 15 having a moment of connection with God/The Universe where I heard a voice say to me that my road to recovery with my eating disorder would be long, but that when I did rise beyond it completely, it would be lasting and nothing would be able to take this away from me.
I am wondering, does this align with my chart and being a Sagittarian - or am I drawing this out unnecessarily? I do feel the strongest and the happiest I have ever been, but there are still some niggling behaviours and I wonder if I am hanging onto them because I am telling myself the road was going to be long. I also feel sad sometimes thinking that I am 36 and this is still a part of my life.
At the same time, I think of the poem Ithaka that you shared (love it!), and can't help but feel that everything is happening as it is meant to. That I am right on track. That this is my fragrant journey to Ithaka.
Love to know your thoughts :)
Poem
"Sometimes, I am Startled Out of Myself" by Barbara Crooker